Stationery

I’ve always had a fetish about stationery. Not in a kinky way, but I just love the smell of new staplers, reams and reams of blank paper and post-it notes. The rattling of biros in their boxes is music to my ears. I’m clearly not alone in this. Part of my job is to monitor the stationery levels and re-order as necessary and I often go to the stationery cupboard and find people purportedly looking for a particular item, but I’ve seen the gleam in their eyes as they gaze longingly at the punched pockets and document wallets. They lurk with intent beside the notebooks and ringbinders waiting for a moment alone so they can… well. I’ m not sure what they actually want to do. I personally just love looking at it, all piled up neatly. I used to want to own it and I stole copious amounts of it in previous jobs. I even had to ‘acquire’ a stationery cupboard in which to keep it all. I have less storage space now and almost no desire to actually possess this magical stuff. But stationery catalogues are still pornography to me.